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I am my uncle's only near
relative. I live about 500 miles away. My uncle lives in
terrible conditions. His home is filthy and unsanitary. He
is diabetic and he doesn't take his medicine properly. When
I saw him recently he had terrible sores on his legs. I know
he is not eating, and he won't go to the doctor. I have
offered to help find him a better place to live but he says
no. I don't know what the right thing is to do. I am afraid
that if I call social services they will force him to go to
a nursing home and he will die.
In this case, if your uncle
has refused your help and you know he is neglecting himself
and living in dangerous
conditions you really have no option but to call your local
Elder Abuse/Neglect agency and report his situation. They
will investigate and offer your uncle whatever options are
available for him. Often, if the elderly person will accept,
social services can provide emergency cleaning and
homemaker/nursing services to visit regularly. If he won't
accept help at home and social services observes that he is
unable to care for himself they can make arrangements for
him to receive care in a nursing facility.
Amazingly, we frequently see people who swore that going
into care would "kill" them actually end up thriving on the
extra attention, regular meals and medication supervision.
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