I recently was privileged to accompany a new client as he made "pre-arrangements" with a local funeral home. His wife passed away this year and he is in the process of putting his own affairs in order. Prior to her passing neither of them had made any provisions for disability or death, and he has seen first hand the benefit of planning ahead.

This wonderful gentleman served with pride in two wars, World War II and in Korea. Although he's quiet about it, he would really like to have a simple military funeral.

But, there's a but...isn't there always a "but."

His wife always took care of the paperwork. After her death he had lots of help from family, who helped him clean out his home and move to an assisted living residence. Somewhere, somehow, his military records went missing.

He needs to give a copy of his official discharge (his DD-214) to the funeral home so they can arrange the final ceremony he wants.

Luckily, he's in relatively good health and there was time to get the document. Time isn't always a luxury we have.

We went to the VA website, followed the instructions, and in just about a month he had the form he needed. (Of course, the minute it arrived I immediately ran it down to the office to make multiple copies.)

If your elder served in the military there are probably benefits available. In order to access VA benefits, just about the first thing a veteran will need is the DD-214. Finding it is the tricky part. As soon as you get the chance, ask your elder where his or her military discharge papers are. If the answer is a blank look, see if he remembers his service number. It's amazing how that number sticks in the memory of most who served.

Then go ahead and request an official copy. Immediate family members (spouse or children) can request one with minimal hassle. It will probably be easier in the long run to get a replacement than to find the original if you got that blank look.

And, don't forget the women in your family. A whole lot of women served in WWII, Korea, and Vietnam (not to mention the Gulf). They are probably entitled to benefits, too.